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How to Make a Dating Plan of Attack | Flirting Lessons

Posted by: [email protected] Posted on: October 19, 2017 , , , , , , , , ,

Howcast
Watch more How to Flirt videos: http://www.howcast.com/videos/512222-…

Is your love life a disaster? Improve it by learning how to make a dating plan of attack. Our relationship experts tell you how in this video.

Hunt: You know what’s one of the worst things to hear when you’e going out on a date right at the beginning? What do I do?

Rachael: Oh, that’s a nonstarter.

Hunt: What’s sexy in a guy?

Rachael: Having him take control of it…

Hunt: …Right…

Rachael: …He had planned out everything…

Hunt: …He’s got confidence, he’s got leadership. Guys, you need to come in with a plan and stick to it, for the beginning.

Rachael: Yeah.

Hunt: As you start to develop, obviously, you want to improvise later on. But, most men, sorry guys, you’re going to mess things up if left to their own accord. Right? We do have some…

Rachael: …No, never.

Hunt: Basically, you want to come in. I’m going to pick her up. We’re going to go here. Then, we’re going to go there afterwards. You might come up with other ideas, but you know if you stick to this, you’ve got a plan, you’re going to get there, and you’re going to go with it. Do women like a man that’s concise and knows what he wants?

Rachael: Absolutely. And part of the benefit of planning it is that you get to plan around things that she likes to do. Honestly, that’s the best way to a woman’s heart – that you’re planning a date. So, you’re doing all of the work, and you’re doing it around things that she loves. She’s done.

Hunt: If you can free flow a little bit more, what I always like to do is give the women some sort of a choice, but with plans. Say, okay, do you like Italian or Chinese better. I already have two different restaurants, either two reservations already set or places that I know that we can just walk into. So, she feels like she got to have some input into it. There is nothing worse than a woman trying to, at the moment, well we could do this and we could do that and we could do this.

Rachael: No. And, actually, don’t go to the far right of that extreme, too. Because I was on a date once where the guy ordered for me.

Hunt: Oh, wow.

Rachael: I was like, is that really necessary. And he ordered things that I would never enjoy. So, let her have a choice…

Hunt: …Right…

Rachael: …and be that assertive man at the same time.

Hunt: But I know that for a lot of guys…

Rachael: …But not too assertive…

Hunt: …especially when you’re nervous and going out on those first dates, when you’ve got somewhat of a plan, somewhat of an itinerary in your head, it’s going to make you be a lot more comfortable and allow you to enjoy yourself on the date.

Rachael: Which is important.

Hunt: Very important.

Rachael: Have fun.

How to Flirt with Your Wife | Flirting Lessons

Posted by: [email protected] Posted on: September 21, 2017 , , , , , , ,


Howcast
Watch more How to Flirt videos: http://www.howcast.com/videos/512191-…

Want to add a little spice to your relationship? Learn how to flirt with your wife in this online flirting lesson.

Hunt Ethrideg: One of the things that people ask me as a dating coach, they’re like, ‘Well, does it work?’ Well, it worked on someone at least because I’m married. Now, at the same…

Rachael DeAlto: I was married.

Hunt: Yeah, so we both know what it means to be in there. And one of the biggest things that we have to work with especially in a relationship is in order to make it seem fresh and interesting and vibrant. And there’s I’ve heard, you know, romantic love is like fireworks and married love is more like an embers. It’s more hot burning but much lower of energy and the thing is you need to make sure that you’re still dating your wife at the same time.

Rachael: Getting the paper. Yes.

Hunt: Exactly. At the same time. One of the things that I like to do is to just do things for no reason. You know, nice positive things. Come home from a day not bring flowers but it’s like ‘Hey I found this cute little key chain.’ It doesn’t, she’s just going to, she’s not going to do anything with it but it’s like, ‘Oh you thought of me in the middle of the day, how sweet.’ And at the same time make sure that you’re complimenting them and on things that are real. Not, ‘Oh babe you look great,’ but like, ‘Oh that’s a really good choice of shoes. Like why did you choose that?’

Rachael: I think that’s so important to talk about, the fact that it’s coming from an authentic place.

Hunt: Yes.

Rachael: Everything you do has to come from the heart and then it almost doesn’t matter what you do or what you say as long as it’s nice. So absolutely complimenting her. I always love to recommend and, it’s like beating a dead horse of, getting ‘The Five Love Languages’ by Gary Chapman is a great book, especially if you are looking to bring that spark back and connect with your wife. It’s all about speaking her language. So, I know for me I love affirmations. So, as a wife I would want to hear that I,you know, you still think I’m beautiful or you still you want to whatever.

Hunt: Right.

Rachael: I don’t know how dirty we can get here but you are married. So just wanting to feel wanted is such a great feeling when you’ve been married to someone for however long. And then having them put a little bit of effort into things. You know, when you’re first dating guys you go all out. You are hunters.

Hunt: Yep.

Rachael: And you are pursuing and taking care of and then you get us and it’s like, ‘Hey, well, I don’t have to work as hard,’ but that’s not true.

Hunt: Now’s the time to put the real energy in to keep the maintenance.

Rachael: Exactly.

Hunt: When people say that marriages work. It’s work because…

Rachael: Hard work.

Hunt: But people, a lot of people, yeah. It’s, exactly. People think they get on the train, the train is already going, just sit back and let it go. No, you constantly need to stoke the fires

Rachael: Exactly.

Hunt: and keep it going. And you know, this is done in a lot of ways like you were talking about.

Rachael: Go back to a first date. That’s such a great thing when you’ve been together for awhile. Literally recreating exactly what you did on your first date will bring back that emotion that you were like, ‘Oh, that’s exciting. I got those butterflies.’ Another thing I love that’s really fun and flirty is to get competitive with each other. It gets the adrenaline pumping, so go play racquetball.

Hunt: Yep.

Rachael: Or go play some competitive type sport against each other.

Hunt: And there’s just been a couple of studies done recently that people that give each other pet names stay together longer. And this isn’t to stay like schmoopy and. You don’t really need to get but even just having a cute pet name, it lets them know that you think of them in this cute and fun way and it’s great to hear. So you know, think of something that’s just cute and sweet just to let her know she still has it, will always have it, and she has you.

Rachael: And go make out.

Hunt: Make out. Kiss a lot.

How to Flirt If You’re Shy | Flirting Lessons

Posted by: [email protected] Posted on: July 20, 2017 , , , , , , ,

Howcast
Watch more How to Flirt videos: http://www.howcast.com/videos/512203-…

Just because you’re shy doesn’t mean you can’t be a killer flirt. In this video, two relationship experts share flirting tips for the bashful.

Rachael DeAlto: Are you feeling shy?

Hunt Ethrideg: I’m a little bit shy.

Rachael: A little bit?

Hunt: A little bit.

Rachael: Well, you need to flirt too as a shy person.

Hunt: But it’s, how? It’s so difficult. Everyone’s like talkative and then they do things. What does a shy person do?

Rachael: Well, I would say the first thing you have to do is get the right attitude.

Hunt: Yeah.

Rachael: Yep. It’s all the attitude. It’s all in your head. So, when you’re starting to have a conversation with someone understand that they want to talk to you.

Hunt: Yeah, you want to talk to me?

Rachael: Yeah! I mean, don’t say it like that but as you start to come out of your shell as a shy person it’s all about believing that you can be whatever you want to be for that period of time. We’re not looking to change personalities, but even when you’re shy you can flirt, you can smile. How hard is it to smile?

Hunt: Well see, that’s the thing that sometimes people don’t realize. You know, we were talking in the previously in one about the main thing that a lot of shy people have to worry about is body language.

Rachael: Yeah. Look at what Hunt was just doing.

Hunt: Because, look. Unconsciously when they sit like this.

Rachael: He’s trying to hide. He’s trying to hide from the world right here.

Hunt: And they might want to meet people but if there were two people and you were sitting there like this and someone else was sitting there like this, who are you going to want to talk to all night?

Rachael: I know, I look a little scary like that. But absolutely you’re going, you’re gonna to feel different when you change your body posture, when you change the way you’re sitting or presenting yourself. So, the first thing is attitude. The second think I think would be to really be conscious of the way that you’re sitting or presenting yourself, if you’re standing somewhere. pen yourself up! You know, you don’t have to say everything and I think that’s where people who are shy think that they can’t flirt because they have to, you know, start a conversation on their own or they have to keep a conversation going. That’s not really the case.

Hunt: Right.

Rachael: You can flirt without saying a word through your body language, through your eyes, through your smiling.

Hunt: One of the things I know, for me, is sometimes that if we know that you are interested or we know that you want to have things we might naturally be drawn to be people that are more outspoken but if you say like, ‘You know, I’m just a little bit shy,’ and it’s like, ‘but I enjoy talking to you’ or something like that. It lets the person know okay, it’s not that this person is

Rachael: Yeah.

Hunt: cold or doesn’t want to interact with me. They absolutely do. And once you know someone it’s, ‘Oh! of course. Okay.’

Rachael: It’s okay, and you’re like, ‘Oh my gosh, I can talk to this person!’ Absolutely, that’s a great point, because most shy people that I’ve worked they with might be shy at first but then once they get comfortable they’re blabbing just as much as we are.

Hunt: And I want to let you know too, speaking from a lot of my guy friends, that they love shy women because when they feel like when they open up to them they get this special secret that no one else knows in this personality. So, while the media and the movies are filled with all of these outgoing, you know, extroverts it’s not to say that there isn’t so much that’s valued about shy people too. They keep their confidences more, they feel like they’re learning more about people. So it’s something that people absolutely are drawn to. You just have to let them know, ‘I am interested’.

Rachael: I love that. And you know what? Take that home, take to heart. Take what he said because knowing that there are people that are drawn to your shyness and really appreciate the fact that you don’t just, you know, show up as this gregarious whirlwind like I do. It’s a good thing. So embrace that. Love yourself.

Hunt: Yes.

Rachael: Go get them.

Hunt: People love shy people. No problem being shy. Just, you know, push yourself just a little bit.

How to Deal with Rejection | Flirting Lessons

Posted by: [email protected] Posted on: July 10, 2017 , , , , , ,

Howcast
Watch more How to Flirt videos: http://www.howcast.com/videos/512210-…

Flirting offers many rewards — you could meet someone special, it can boost your ego. But you also run the risk of being rejected. Learn how to deal with it in this video.

Rachael DeAlto: Rejection sucks.

Hunt Ethridge: It does.

Rachael: Big time. But, it’s a part of dating. It’s a part of flirting. It’s a part of life. You’re going to get rejected by people for love interests. And you’re going to get rejected for jobs. There’s a lot of stuff that, kind of, you have to deal with. So.

Hunt: It’s going to happen.

Rachael: Exactly. Let’s be practical here. How do we deal with rejection? My advice is basically to just get back on the horse. Realize that they make mint chocolate chip and strawberry for a reason. That not everybody is meant for you, but there is somebody out there that is. So, if you’re flirting with someone and they’re like, not interested, it’s so much better to get right back out there, and meet somebody else, and get that positive reinforcement…

Hunt: Yep.

Rachael: …than to go into the corner and be like, ‘Oh my gosh. They didn’t like me. Why am I here? Why do I even bother? I quit dating.’

Rachael: And this is one of the things, too, that talk to my clients about – the mindset too. Because the word reject is such a strong word, too.

Rachael: It is.

Hunt: To reject something really you have to know it, understand it, balance it against something else, and then choose one thing. We use the word, ‘I got rejected.’ No, no you didn’t. She doesn’t know anything about you.

Rachael: Yes.

Hunt: He doesn’t know anything about you. All it is is it’s a nonstarter. I used to be an actor. And when I would go in and hear no on my auditions I used to think it’s because…

Rachael: It’s me.

Hunt: It’s no to me. I’m not a good person. I’m not talented enough. I’m not smart enough. I’m not attractive enough. And the same thing when you go out and meet people. You realize, it isn’t.

Rachael: No.

Hunt: They don’t know you. They don’t know all your great qualities. They don’t know how funny you are. They don’t know how smart you are. It’s just not going, it’s just two ships passing in the wind…

Rachael: Yeah.

Hunt: …at that point.

Rachael: It’s a little cliche. It’s not about you. It’s about them. It’s their perception of you, which, honestly, you shouldn’t care about. So, you can get rejected for so many different reasons. You could get rejected because they’re in a relationship and they don’t want to go outside of it. You could get rejected because your hair’s the wrong color.

Hunt: You could get rejected because they didn’t get a good night of sleep last night…

Rachael: Exactly…

Hunt: and they just don’t want to talk to you.

Rachael: My God, don’t talk to me after not a good night of sleep. But those are all these things that you can’t know without actually getting inside their head. So, don’t spend so much time getting inside your head. Get back out there. Get on the horse. Have some more positive connections, and you’ll be surprised.

Hunt: Yep. If you go up and talk to somebody and it doesn’t go well, what did you lose? You lost 15 seconds, that’s it.

Rachael: Exactly.

Hunt: Everything else that you feel you lost is only in your head, so just change your mindset and get out there. It’ll allow you to really go after what you want.

Rachael: Agreed.

How to Flirt Using Body Language | Flirting Lessons

Posted by: [email protected] Posted on: July 8, 2017 , , , , , , ,

Howcast
Watch more How to Flirt videos: http://www.howcast.com/videos/512181-…

Wish you were better at flirting? All it takes is a couple of helpful tips and some practice. In this video, you’ll learn how to flirt using body language.

Hunt Etheridge: Um, hi! How you doing?

Rachael DeAlto: Hi.

Hunt: Hi. You, ah, come around here?

Rachael: No.

Hunt: Why not? Like, this is a great place to be. It’s a fun, fun area. You don’t look like you’re having fun.

Rachael: No, I don’t really like it here.

Hunt: Well, can I get you a drink or something?

Rachael: I’m good.

Hunt: Really?

Rachael: Yeah, thanks. Anyway.

Hunt: Okay. Yeah.

Rachael: That’s what not to do on my part if I was looking to actually be receptive. Let’s try it again with body language that would show that we’re gonna be receptive to each other.

Hunt: I’d like that.

Rachael: He was a little offended by me.

Hunt: Hello!

Rachael: Hey!

Hunt: Hey, I’m Hunt.

Rachael: Oh, nice to meet you. I’m Rachael.

Hunt: Oh, nice to meet you too. So, you part of this meet up group?

Rachael: I am. I love it! It’s so much fun. We do really amazing things together.

Hunt: Yeah.

Rachael: So did you just start it?

Hunt: Yeah. I just joined, I just moved into town.

Rachael: Oh, that’s awesome.

Hunt: I don’t really know a lot of people so I figured this’d be a good way to meet people.

Rachael: Oh, I’m here for you now!

Hunt: Oh, that’s great! That’s great!

Rachael: I’ll show you around.

Hunt: Um, what are you drinking?

Rachael: Ah, Martini.

Hunt: Oh, can I, may I?

Rachael: Absolutely.

Hunt: Alright. Give me one second.

Rachael: Okay.

Hunt: I’ll be right back.

Rachael: So obviously, that is an example of open body language. Where you’re facing each other. You’re squared off. The toes are pointed towards each other and you’re actually using touch to reinforce a positive feeling.

Hunt: Yep. I know there’s a lot of eye contact too.

Rachael: Yes. There’s smiling.

Hunt: You know, guys don’t make as much eye contact as women do.

Rachael: No.

Hunt: But there’s nothing more dismissive than kind of speaking over your shoulder.

Rachael: That’s terrible.

Hunt: Or when she’s talking and looking around. If you feel a connection or you want there to be a connection, the eyes are the window to the soul.

Rachael: Aww. And the other thing that we can talk about is mirroring.

Hunt: Yes.

Rachael: Mirroring is a really easy way to make someone else feel super comfortable with you without even trying. And it’s all about so, if I touch your arm, you touch my arm. If I move backwards, you come forwards. It’s all about really mirroring between the two parties. A way to make them feel like . . .

Hunt: If she turns around to look at the TV, you know, you turn around and kind of . . .

Rachael: You leave! But, it’s just a natural way. It’s a subconscious way to let someone else feel really comfortable with the situation. You can even take a drink of your Martini at the same time.

Hunt: Yep, yeah, exactly. And it’s part of actual sociology that we want to feel connected. And the quickest way to feel connected is to be accepted and be doing the same things. So, and you’ll notice this when someone’s interested in you. And it’s also a thing that you can consciously do yourself to let the other person know that you’re interested. So, how ’bout that drink?

Rachael: Can’t wait.

Hunt: May I?

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